It's Looking Better

In the interest of not alarming my poor readers... I should let you know I'm not nearly as depressed as the last two or three posts sounded. God is helping me deal with each of the three "bombs" that went off in my life last week. And maybe some of the pregnancy hormones are starting to calm down, too. Not sure. I really have no idea how long they're in your system after a miscarriage. All I know is... I'm doing better. Still having to take it easy (IE: feeling completely useless), but PC and BB are taking good care of me. Yes! Even BB! He's been really surprising me at the way he's stepping up to the plate lately. He's showing a more serious and thoughtful side with all the unexpected stuff going on, has been helping out in new ways, and has been unusually careful and gentle with me. Even the hugs I'm getting (which are even more frequent than normal - and I get a lot of hugs from him even on normal days) are different. A little longer, and decidedly gentle. The other day I was fretting a little about PC going back to work tomorrow, and I told BB that since I'm still fairly shaky on my feet in moments, that I would need him to help me out by letting me hang onto his arm if we have to go anywhere without dad. He looked very serious and said "okay" and I've been noticing that he's more... aware??... that I'm a bit unsteady on my feet still. Moving a tad slower when he's near me, and... watching?? to make sure I'm okay. On one hand it makes me feel a little bad. But on the other... well, it's nice to see the thoughtfulness and the care he's taking. And maybe this is good preparation for when he has a wife someday. Perhaps he's learning to be more gentle and careful with people weaker or smaller than himself. And that would be a good thing. And the shaky thing is slowly going away. I notice it most when I've been on my feet too long. Which hasn't been much, considering the way PC glares at me when he thinks I'm overdoing it. ;-) 

It's nice to be loved.