It's Been a Wild Journey

...but here I am.

I was:

~a single gal (And not thrilled with that, but what can you do until the right man comes along, eh?)

~a self-employed music teacher (And loving that part of my life. At least on most days. When my students had actually practiced that week. And their parents remembered to pay me. And little things like that.)

~still living in my parent's home (Hey, don't judge me, it's way more convenient and whole lot less lonely that way. And my mom is one amazing cook. Which was especially lovely when I was working late and really didn't feel like cooking when I got home.)

~highly involved in my church (Okay, honestly... I mostly loved that. Until I got so burned out I had to quit. Everything. Except playing the piano. And then it got so much better. It's amazing how little you take in when you're constantly giving out. And you've no idea how wonderful it is to be a student in an adult Sunday school class unless you've never been in one - like me. I felt like I was (spiritually) learning to walk again. Okay, I still do feel that way. But that's a really long story. Much too long to tell you today.)

But then God (and life in general) dumped me on my head. Um, yeah. Almost literally. Which was a good portion of that whole "learning to walk again" thing. It's kinda frightening to see how fast one successful single music teacher can go KERSPLAT! and be depending on people for all kinds of things that she promised herself she would NEVER depend on ANYone for. Yeah, frightening. And humbling. Extremely so.

But in the middle of the most painful time of my life, God brought along my Prince. And now...

I am:

~married to the wonderful man I waited for, for so long

~a stepmom to two wonderful boys

~a full-time homemaker

~a homeschool mom to said two wonderful boys (Okay, they're quickly becoming young men.)

~not as involved in my church (Although I do still play the piano every service and occasionally lead worship. But not much else.)

~living in a new town and have a new last name (More significant than you might know.)

~busier than I've ever been in my life (That's saying something, because at one point in my single years I was working three jobs while still almost single-handedly running the children's Sunday school and the music ministry. I know what busy is.)

~delighting in watching God bring healing into the lives of my boys (Yes, they call me "mom".)

~losing part of myself, while at the same time

~finding myself and being fulfilled in ways I've never known before

Before The One and I got married (and yes, I DO believe there is one right person for you to marry, and many people have tried to change my mind - and failed in the trying - and I believe this far more firmly after being married than I even did before) I did oodles of research on blended families/step families, read everything I could get my hands on, talked at length with every stepchild and stepparent I knew. One thing I found a tremendous lack in was real-life stepmoms who blog about life as it really is on a daily basis. Especially blogs from stepmoms who become the full-time caregiver. Are most stepmoms only part-time stepmoms? I don't know the answer to that, but it's not true for me. And I'm very certain I'm not the only woman walking on this path. But with the huge lack of info and support for those of us in that position, I decided to write my own blog. 

So here it is. The beginning of a stepmom blog. If my daily struggles (even the stupid ones in my own head) will somehow help the next woman who walks this road... well, I'd like to share with her. If you are that woman... welcome! C'mon in, pull up a chair and have a cup of tea. Or coffee. But make sure you grab a kleenex (maybe the whole box) because for some silly (or is it silly?) reason, we women seem to cry a lot when we're sharing our hearts. And I want to hear YOUR story just as much as I want to try to encourage you with my own story.

If you're not a stepmom, but you'd like to understand a little better what it's like on this road, you're welcome here too. But only on one condition. That you try to leave your preconceived ideas at the door, and enter with an open heart and mind. There's a reason that stepmoms have a special bond between them. It's because there are some things that we understand only from being on this particular road, and well-meaning people say some pretty cruel things about us and this road we're on. I'm sure it's because they don't understand how hurtful they are, and they would be horrified if they knew. So. As long as you promise to leave your judgments at the door (right beside that pile of boxes I've been trying to get unpacked since last May) I think we'll get along fine.

I will warn you though... I plan to be completely real on this blog. If I'm having a rotten day I'm going to say so. And if I have something to celebrate... well, I plan on throwing a huge ol' party. So you might want to grab a kazoo along with that box of kleenex, 'cause you never know which one you're going to need. Maybe both in one afternoon.

Oh, and one other thing. I don't really "do" the whole stepfamily thing. I'd much rather claim these boys as my own. I think they're pretty much the greatest kiddos in the world. So from here on out, I'm Mom. And these are my boys. I like it like that. They like it like that. And if you don't like that, well, you're reading on the wrong blog for you. :-)